Ever have one of those days when it feels like everything is in crises and you can do nothing right? That was today. We've had a series of difficulties around here lately, beginning with the truck we bought in Merrill (we had my father-in-law check it out for us so we actually bought it sight unseen). We went to collect it in Malin on Thanksgiving and discovered the radiator is full of oil, so it needs about $400 in repairs, and it still sits in Malin. Then, the new family van, the 1987 VW Vanagon we bought just three months ago, had a critical blow out in its engine on the freeway in Portland, so it still sits in Portland at my Aunt and Uncle's house. We can't afford to repair it, and the can't tow it home because the truck sits in Malin, also broken. Then, to top it all off, Travis hasn't worked for a week because the stone they need for their next job did not get ordered or delivered on time. And this comes after having the past two pay periods short on hours. So, now we are in near-dire financial circumstances, unsure how we will pay all the bills and our mortgage, and we have two broken vehicles on opposite sides of the state. Needless to say, I am feeling the pressure. And then, today, I felt like I couldn't even do a good job as a mom. I know all moms make mistakes, all moms have days and moments they regret, but I just hate having those. I hate letting my kids down, I hate that fear that I might be forever screwing up these two little boys with the mistakes I make. I will be glad tonight when I get to snuggle up with little Eli on the bunk beds and read to the boys until I hear that sweet sound of their sleep breathing. Glad to wake up tomorrow to a new day, another chance to do a better job, to learn and grow as a mom.